Happiness is the result of inner maturity. It depends on us alone, and requires patient work, carried out from day to day. Happiness must be built, and this requires time and effort. In the long term, happiness and unhappiness are therefore a way of being, or a life skill.
Matthieu Ricard
Almost 12 years ago I became a certified life coach and created True Nature Life and Leadership Coaching. I called my coaching practice True Nature because I firmly believe that to be deeply fulfilled, we must live our life true to our nature, or in alignment with our natural way of being. I’ve worked with so many people who have spent most of their lives trying to be someone they are not, feeling shut down, frozen with self-doubt and wondering why the hell they are so miserable.Bronnie Ware, a palliative care nurse who wrote a book called Top Five Regrets of the Dying, writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how we might learn from their wisdom. Guess what the number one regret is?
“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
“This was the most common regret of all” writes Ware. “When people realise that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honoured even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realise, until they no longer have it.”
What stops us from living a life aligned with what truly brings us happiness?
It’s complex, no doubt. There’s obstacles that can be challenging like where we were born or live, our upbringing, painful experiences and economics can play a role in our conditioning. But what it really gets down to is FEAR, fear of failure, not being good enough, yada, yada, yada, you know those voices. What keeps us from choosing a path of fulfillment are these insidious dis-empowering beliefs are actually running our life. They are like little dictators telling us to be this or do that or else you’ll never amount to much, no will like you because you’re a loser.
Some common examples are:
“I am just not good enough to ______,”
“I am too shy, old, young, to _______.
“I’ll never be able to make money doing _____.”
“If only I had __________, then I would be happy”
As a coach, I listen for the “I can’t, I should, I always,” statements that points to an underlying limiting belief that’s doing exactly that, limiting your life. True transformation starts first by courageously investigating this thinking process while doing our best to practice kindness towards ourselves. Compassion is super important!
Our thinking leads to behavior which creates habits and actions that determine the results.
What are the results you’re getting in life? What are the results that you want?
Could it be as simple as a old worn out pattern of thinking that we take for the truth, that’s obscuring joy, freedom and deep inner peace? What if you looked into the nature of this core dis-empowering belief and couldn’t find any proof that it was true? How might your life be different? Who would you be without this belief?
As a coach, it’s my job to explore thinking that limits and challenge who you think you are in order to uncover who you really are. Having someone by your side who doesn’t have a agenda other than holding accountable to what’s important to you and how you want to BE in this one precious life. A coaching relationship is a powerful alliance that can be life changing for both the client and coach, which is just one of the reasons I love what I do!
I basically took a break from coaching to focus on creating Dharma Ranch with my life partner Susan. It’s been two years and now that Dharma Ranch is up and running, I’m ready to once again be awed by your creativity, resourcefulness and courage.
I hold the belief that if you really recognize that the truth of who you are is so beautiful, so precious, so full of value, and so magnificent, you would devote the totality of your life to it.
For a FREE coaching session, GET IN TOUCH
Mention this blog post and receive a $50.00 discount off my monthly fee. A coaching package also includes the 2 hour “Discovery Session” that entails getting clear on your core personal values, looking at all areas of your life, where you want to go and what’s needed for this to happen. It’s super fun and enlightening!
What are you waiting for?
